Nobody is ever too good at dating. At some point in our lives, we all feel the chills, the butterflies in the stomach, and the overwhelming anxiety of dating someone.
There’s just so many questions. So many worries. Am I dating the right person? Is he the one? Will he like me? Will this ever work out?
Whatever point in life you might be right now – whether you’ve been single for so long or has just gotten divorced, you deserve more than a fling. You deserve to find a perfect relationship that will make you happier and complete.
So let these 10 key dating tips for a single or a divorced woman save you time, energy and heartache. Below are some tips to conquer your dating worries, find Mr. Right, and spruce up your love life:
Dating Tips if You’re Divorced
You could be at the stage in your life where you feel apprehensive about dating again… fearing possible rejection, being eaten slowly by your insecurities and trust issues.
It’s okay. It’s normal to feel that way. Just stay positive. Here’s how you should prepare yourself:
1. Avoid getting stuck
Get back on track with yourself and adjust to your new single lifestyle. It’s going to feel weird and uncomfortable. It’s absolutely normal to feel that way. However, if ever those negative feelings get out of your control, think of this: Just because your marriage didn’t work out doesn’t mean you don’t deserve love anymore.
2. Give yourself time
Don’t rush. True love waits, so they say. You need not spend hours browsing profiles on Tinder or joining blind dates. Spend more time putting your pieces together. Relinquish the fun of being single once again. Go to the gym, do yoga. Meet new people. Go out with friends. Enjoy the little things you were unable to do when you were still in a relationship. At the same time, open your doors to other people. Mr. Right could just be right there, waiting for the perfect opportunity to come closer to you.
3. Fake it ‘til you make it
When you feel like you can’t do it, just do it! Wherever you are – at the club, in the gym, or anywhere else that you may have an opportunity to meet someone, act confidently, even if you feel shaky inside. Hold your head up high and show your greatest smile. People will notice you more and will think you are approachable. As you interact more and more, you will surely feel more confident.
4. De-stress before your first date
A first date can be stressful. You sure have a lot of ‘what ifs’. Like all women on their first dates, you fear the unknown. One of the best ways to deal with anxiety is to get organized. Organize your thoughts. Write them down. You may start with listing down the characteristics of a man you want. Use positive self-talk. When anxiety keeps creeping in, tell yourself loudly “You will be fine. You can do it!”. Have a warm rejuvenating bath. It’s relaxing and refreshing. After all, you need to look your best on your first date.
5. Analyze your previous mistakes to avoid new ones
What went wrong with your previous relationship? Take time to reflect and figure out your mistakes. Have you been too controlling? Too giving? Have you had less time nurturing your relationship? If it’s helpful, write them down. For a fresh new start, you would want to avoid making the same mistakes again.
Dating Tips if You’re Single
So you’ve been single for a long time and you probably have no idea whether or not you are dealing with the right guy. Don’t worry, here’s what will make you reach the end game:
1. Be mindful of your date
People reveal themselves within 15 minutes on average. Watch and listen. Carefully observe his gestures, the way he talks, and what he likes talking about. You will get a pretty good idea of who he really is.
2. If it isn’t working, then lose it
If you’re not planning on a second date, woman up, and be honest. Don’t waste your time and the other person’s time. Don’t get to a new relationship with second thoughts. If you’re not feeling it, let the other person know.
3. Be wary of the “it’s-fine-you-decide-guy”
Avoid lazy guys who make you plan everything. If there’s one of you who should make an effort planning your first and succeeding dates, it should be him. A guy who has much interest in getting to know you and impressing you will make efforts to make your date special.
4. Give importance to what you feel
Never ever let someone mistreat you or disrespect you. Some men are good at making women feel wanted only to take advantage of them later. Looks are a big plus. But character and attitude define a person and account for a successful and fulfilling relationship.
5. Never trust a date who’s rude to waiters
Pay attention to how your date treats and tips the wait staff at restaurants. His attitude towards these people is a kind of poker tell that reveals his character, more than his relationship with money. You can easily tell if he’s a braggart or just being kind by the way he tips the waiters.
Dating can be exhausting, it’s true. You have your doubts and personal issues. But dating can lead you to the right person – the one who will love you genuinely. Whether you’ve just gotten out of a failed marriage or haven’t found the one yet, remember to apply these tips when dating. Don’t contain yourself in your room worrying about how you never had a great relationship. Get out there and don’t be afraid to open your door to others. If you don’t succeed at first, don’t give up. Just follow these tips and try again. Here’s the truth – the one you’ve been looking all your life might just be around the corner.